


Hehe Tommy go Brrrr and Explodes Everything (including cows)

by Stirling74



Category: Dream SMP - Fandom, Minecraft (Video Game), Video Blogging RPF
Genre: Author is tired, Chaos, Gen, I can’t tag for shit, Tommy has issues, Wtf am I doing, actually they all do, can i go to bed yet, im dying inside, kinda gory but not really, pls send help
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2021-02-22
Updated: 2021-02-23
Packaged: 2021-03-11 22:33:57
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death
Chapters: 2
Words: 638
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29625003
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Stirling74/pseuds/Stirling74
Summary: Tommy is an idiot.An idiot with superpowers.A superpowered idiot that loves chaos.I think you know where this is going.
Relationships: Clay | Dream & Sapnap & TommyInnit (Video Blogging RPF), Jschlatt & Toby Smith | Tubbo & TommyInnit, Wilbur Soot & Technoblade, Wilbur Soot & Technoblade & TommyInnit & Phil Watson, Wilbur Soot & TommyInnit & Phil Watson
Comments: 1
Kudos: 27





	1. Oh dear

**Author's Note:**

> Haha my brain go slat and this is the result
> 
> ...Enjoy!
> 
> (Also comment and kudos are basically my self-esteem so leave some of you like this thx)

Tommy decided he didn’t like Dream.

Well, he knew that already, but the fact Dream had just blown up his stuff AGAIN just solidified that thought.

Tommy stared at Dream, wishing he had a fish to slap him with. Dream smiled at him. Or maybe it was the mask.

Fish. Slap.

He made a note to kidnap a salmon child later. 

Dream sighed in a disappointed kind of way. 

“Tommy, this is for your own good. You went behind my back, and this is the punishment. You know this”

Tommy was starting to think Wilbur had the right idea. These so-called “friends” were so annoying. Then again, he didn’t think friends blew up other people’s stuff.

Lucky for Tommy, he had the foresight to make an extra set of iron tools and armour.

He was such a Big Man.

He glared at Dream. The mask stared back. God how he hated that mask.

“Fuck off Green Bitch! You’re nothing compared to me! I’m Big Man!”

Dream didn’t look impressed. Tommy puffed himself up so he resembled a thin beanpole with a slight dent at the top.

“Tommy, shut up”

Oh no. Dream did not just say that.

“WHAT THE FUCK DREAM, I AM BIG MAN, YOU CANNOT CONTAIN THIS EPICCNESS!”

Then the netherite sword came out, and Tommy was forced to rapidly reconsider his options.

“Okay-okay-okay I’ll shut up-l’ll shut up!”

Defiance was fun when death wasn’t an option, and Tommy wasn’t an idiot. He was a Man. 

The Sword was put away, and Tommy could breathe again.

Until the fucking skeleton shot him

TommyInnit was shot by Arrow

“WHAT THE F-“


	2. Flappy is not impressed

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Tommy adopts an aquatic child. Dream gets yeeted into space

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hahhh I have no idea what I’m doinnnggg

“WHAT THE FUCK?!!” The words echoed around him, but Tommy didn’t notice. What the actual fuck!? He’d survived withers, anarchists, and a fucking child manipulator, and he gets offed by a fucking SKELETON! Oohhh he was gonna blitz that skeleton’s fucking family once he gets out of… what the fuck?

He was in a void.

Because of fucking course.

Then a glowing rainbow orb appeared in front of him, and now Tommy was entirely convinced that he was going insane.

Oh god, now it’s talking.

“|~_§^*’<+/0”

...what the fuck?

“Ah, my apologies, the last time I talked to someone they were a god”

Why couldn’t he just die now? He’ll even forgo the intended mass murder of skeletons. Death had to be better than… whatever this was. Hell, he’ll even settle for this void if the fucking rainbow orb bitch would just FUCK OFF. 

..wait what was it saying again?

“...rules, make sure you don’t completely destroy the universe, you can’t kill anyone, and you’ll be back to normal in 48 hours. Have fun! Don’t cause too much trouble!”

Oh shit.

Maybe he should have listened.

There was a strange whooshing sound, then everything went black.

Fuck.

Hehe lil page break—————————————————————————————

Waking up in the same place you died moments before is not fun. Especially when you’re covered in blood.

Dream was crouched beside him, and Tommy vaguely wondered if he was gonna kill him. That’s something he would do.

“Tommy? How are you alive!?” Dream exclaimed.

Tommy cracked an eye open and glared at him. “I’m Tommy fucking Innit. I don’t die bitch!”

In all actuality he had no idea what was happening but he wasn’t going to let Dream know that. He wasn’t an idiot.

Dream scrutinised him for a moment. Tommy felt like a bug under a microscope. He didn’t like it.

Tommy surged up from the ground, “Stop staring at me stupid bean bitch! Go fuck yourself!” His mind conjured up the image of fish-slapping Dream into the stratosphere. Oh what a dream (hehe pun)

Then there was a wet sloppy sound, and Dream was flying into the air.

There was a salmon child flapping on the ground.

...THE FUCK?


End file.
